Membership & Shop
- Abolish Gravity with immediate effect.
- Make fishing a spectator sport by introducing piranha to the Trent.
- Develop Stoke-on-Trent Civic Centre into an intergalactic space port. with Trent Vale and Hanley being respectively arrival and departure lounges. This will massively increase tourism.
- I will promote Pottermus Hippo to leader of Stoke City Council.
- Have a good breakfast of oatcakes and a delicious lunch of lobby.
- Royal Stoke hospital needs more specialist departments. The Loonys would add good old-fashioned medical wards including: Mercury potions, Electrolysis, Leeching and Lobotomy. The Loony’s will balance the humors.
- If the Liberal candidate fails to be elected we will still send him to the House of Commons to perform exploraTory thoracotomies, this will reveal whether any governing MP’s have a heart.
- I will ensure that all European trains will be fuelled by Gravy.
- We will encourage international free trade with America by knighting the President during his state visit, with the ‘Order of the Coiffure’ and he will be known as Sir Comb-Over.
Fake News Warning
Beware of all other politicians they are faking their fake-news. I am the only true fakir of fake news, almost but not quite, a facetious factory of fakiry.
Have a radical re-think, and be strong like Pottermus the Hippo. Have a good breakfast of oatcakes and a delicious lunch of lobby. Vote Loony for an incredible sense of well-being. Go completely potty at the polling station and put your X on the ballot paper for The Official Monster Raving Loony Party. Vote for insanity, vote for The Incredible Flying Brick, VOTE LOOOONY! . . . You know it makes sense.
The Incredible Flying Brick
It seems to us that if someone is elected as an M.P they should (with the exception of illness or death) remain in their post until the next general election.
The costs to the local ratepayers and taxpayers of running an election runs into thousands of pounds, and is a waste of money, which could be better used on local facilities, health etc..
Just this year 2 M.P’s have resigned their posts in search of a better job.
Labour M.P Jamie Reed announced last month he was standing down as MP for Copeland to take up a post at the Sellafield nuclear plant, and now Labour MP Tristram Hunt is quitting as an MP to become the director of London‘s Victoria and Albert Museum, triggering a by-election.
No doubt all M.P’s state when they win that they are committed to working as an M.P for all the people in thier constituency, but they don’t mention….just until I get a better Job
A great year for us Loonies. First the ‘Welsh Assembly Elections’ which resulted in a major first, our very first ever Party Political Broadcast. Although I was not around for the filming, well done to all those that were, you were all great. I was there for the Election itself though, we stood in all five seats and didn’t come last anywhere. In fact overall – 5,743 Welsh voters wanted us to represent them in Parliament.
May was an interesting month, a gang of us Loonies converged on The Soho Theatre in Dean St, London. With the compliments of James Graham (writer) and Jenny Topper (producer) for the premier of the London opening of ‘Monster Raving Loony’ a very good, sad, and exciting play of ‘Lord David Sutch’. The audience included many people who remembered him, and all spoke well of their memories and recollections of our Spiritual Leader.
June saw us fighting the Tooting by-election, where we came 7th from 14 candidates, actually finishing in the top half.
July, I was invited down to Ashburton to stay at ‘The Golden Lion’ with the compliments of the new owners, although not a hotel anymore. They were very interested in the history of the Party, and its humble beginnings here on June 16th 1982. In fact I do believe we may have a candidate for this area, come another general election!
October saw us at the By-election in Witney Oxfordshire, our candidate,‘The Mad Hatter’ did us proud, once again, not coming last. Whilst there I was involved in a documentary about the history of ‘Great British Party Leaders’. I was very honoured on our behalf, to be asked to be involved.
Then a sudden rush, December you expect to be quiet, but no such luck, two By-elections in a row. Firstly Dec 1st in Richmond Park London, I was the candidate, we came 4th from 8 candidates. Twice in the same year being placed in the top half of the poll, a feat that has not gone unnoticed by the Political Pundits!!!
Then 8th December in Sleaford Lincolnshire, ‘The Iconic Arty Pole’ obtained 200 votes and also escaped coming last, another great result.
Not all over yet, on the 15th Dec I was invited along to The Lakeside Club, Frimley Green to take part in another TV documentary about the Life and times of Screaming Lord Sutch and the Loony Party. Along with Bob Potter, Wild Bob Burgos and many others involved along the way.
I trust that you all had a very Merry Christmas and wish you all a very very Happy New Year. Its looking good already, our spies in the skies inform us that there is likely, or could be, 7/8 By-elections this year.
I have not heard from anyone about a Conference venue for 2017, so have put Blackpool on Red Alert. If any ideas are in the grapevine, hold on to them for discussion.
2017 Greetings From
Howling ‘Laud’ Hope
On behalf of every member of The Isles of Deliberation I’d like to wish you all a cracking Christmas and a very happy New Year. It was great to see so many of you again this year at Blackpool and many thanks also to the Manchester Branch for your colourful Xmas card which arrived this morning with the weekly pigeon from the mainland!! On a rather sad note – my faithful companion and also the Jersey Party mascot – Gunner – went on his final walk recently. Those of you who came to the conference here will remember him well, so now he is up there somewhere chasing Cat Mandu. Congratulations to everyone who stood in an election this past year and best wishes for those to follow.
The Jersey Flyer
Our candidate ‘The Iconic Arty-Pole’ polled 16 more votes than Richmond but finished 7th from 10, upholding our tradition of not coming last.
Dr Caroline Johnson – Con – 17,570
Victoria Ailing – UKIP – 4,426
Ross Pepper – Lib Dem – 3,606
Jim Clarke – Labour – 3,363
Marianne Overton – Lincs Ind – 2,892
Sarah Stock – Ind – 462
The Iconic Arty Pole – Raving Loony – 200
Paul Coyne – ND – 184
Mark Suffield – ND – 74
David Bishop – Bus Pass Elvis Party – 55
I arrived in Sleaford on Sunday 4th Dec, and quickly toured the public meeting places. As usual I was greeted with:
“great to see you, it wouldn’t be a real by-election if you weren’t here.”
Monday was fun, my old friend Nigel Farage held a public meeting in the local Legionnaires Club, I was there and ended up on stage when he stated that there was another party leader in attendance.
Tuesday saw me on a radio chat show and rallying the voters. If everyone that said “we will vote Loony” did, we would win. Perhaps they did vote for the Loony, the real ones! Wednesday ‘The Iconic’ arrived. He had been campaigning in other areas and leaving Sleaford to me. We toured the area in the ‘Loony Battle Bus’ with loud-hailer on full charge, always making people smile. Both of us on radio, and filmed for the local TV news.
Thursday saw us leave our ‘digs’ in Sleaford, The Cherry Tree B&B, thanks to Pauline the landlady, a very nice place.
In actual fact, right next door was ‘The Marquis of Granby’ a public house that made us very welcome, allowing me to use it as party HQ. We moved on to North Hykeham where the count was taking place, and booked into ‘The Ibis’ hotel, where we met up with Nick ‘The Flying Brick’, R U Seerius and Lady Hell ‘n Back. After meeting and greeting, all off to the count, which was another great night with cameras snapping. ‘Arty-Pole’ loved it, playing up to every click he heard, not missing a trick. The new Ukip leader of 17 days Paul Nuttall, insisted on having his picture taken with Britain’s longest serving party leader of 17 years, the Howling ‘Laud’.
All in all a very good by-election, ‘The Iconic Arty-Pole’ did us proud, and likewise we are all very proud of him!
Roll on the next one!!!
Sarah Olney – Lib Dem – 20,510
Zac Goldsmith – Independent – 18,638
Christian Woolmer – Labour – 1,515
Howling ‘Laud’ Hope – Raving Loony – 184
Fiona Simms – Independent – 173
Dominic Stockford – Christian Alliance – 164
Maharajah Jammu – One Love Party – 67
David Powell – Independent – 32
A great result, raised a few eyebrows, coming fourth from eight candidates. Ok, so Conservative and Ukip didn’t stand, they threw their weight behind Zac Goldsmith, so unfortunately they also lost, didn’t they!
I arrived in Richmond on Sunday 27th Nov to start our campaign, although my agent Jason Chinnery, ‘Chinners’ our Minister for Spinning and Bouncing, had already done most of the footwork, getting the nomination papers signed and paving the way for a wonderful sense of camaraderie between us and the electors. Chinners is a local, he knows everybody.
On the Monday, St George of Rideon, our candidate from Gloucester arrived for a day or two, we went canvassing the streets laughing and joking with anybody who he could get to listen. He thoroughly enjoyed himself, pity he couldn’t stay longer.
Thursday, we held our Victory Party in the ‘Triple Crown’ thanks to Harvey the landlord, usually this would be on the Wednesday but circumstances made this difficult, so Thurs it was. A fine line up of entertainment was had by all.
‘The Big Fibbers’ started the show, followed by ‘Chris Dowling’ and ‘Whats Next’, then ‘The Mojo Crew’, ‘Linda Landers’ did a guest spot, as did the Howling ‘Laud’ and – The Teenage Kicker – ‘Chinners’. By now ‘The Flying Brick’ had arrived from Derbyshire and others ready for the count to be held that very same evening. So after a night of raucous Rock’n’Roll of we went,
Myself, The Brick, Knigel Knapp, OB and the Lawd, Yvonne Elwood, Lib Dem Dave and Chinners.
The count was the usual good fun, Flying and Howling getting up to their usual tricks, with the worlds cameras flashing all over the place, when we made our grand entrance. Once again thanks to Chinners for all his hard work and endeavour, a fine job he did. And of course to ‘Punk Rock Harvey’ the landlord, who gave us the use of his premises and the 184 voters who got it right.
Phew, a couple of days back home, then off again on Sunday up to Sleaford Lincolnshire for another by-election on Thurs 8th. Supporting our candidate ‘The Iconic Arty Pole’. Watch for more news!!!
The Howling ‘Laud’