Elections

The Incredible Flying Brick will save Stoke

2017_The_Incredible_Flying_Brick_28_JanThe Incredible Flying Brick is standing in the Stoke-on-Trent Central by-election.
These are his policies:

  • Abolish Gravity with immediate effect.
  • Make fishing a spectator sport by introducing piranha to the Trent.
  • Develop Stoke-on-Trent Civic Centre  into an intergalactic space port. with Trent Vale and Hanley being respectively arrival and departure lounges. This will massively increase tourism.
  • I will promote Pottermus Hippo to leader of Stoke City Council.
  • Have a good breakfast of oatcakes and a delicious lunch of lobby.
  • Royal Stoke hospital needs more specialist departments. The Loonys would add good old-fashioned medical wards including: Mercury potions, Electrolysis, Leeching and Lobotomy. The Loony’s will balance the humors.
  • If the Liberal candidate fails to be elected we will still send him to the House of Commons to perform exploraTory thoracotomies, this will reveal whether any governing MP’s have a heart.
  • I will ensure that all European trains will be fuelled by Gravy.
  • We will encourage international free trade with America by knighting the President during his state visit, with the ‘Order of the Coiffure’ and he will be known as Sir Comb-Over.

Fake News Warning
Beware of all other politicians they are faking their fake-news. I am the only true fakir of fake news, almost but not quite, a facetious factory of fakiry.

Have a radical re-think, and be strong like Pottermus the Hippo. Have a good breakfast of oatcakes and a delicious lunch of lobby. Vote Loony for an incredible sense of well-being. Go completely potty at the polling station and put your X on the ballot paper for The Official Monster Raving Loony Party. Vote for insanity, vote for The Incredible Flying Brick, VOTE LOOOONY! . . . You know it makes sense.

The Incredible Flying Brick
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Sleaford & North Hykeham By-election 8th Dec 2016

2016_9131_North_Kesteven_Sports_Centre_8_DecWow what a busy December, first Richmond, where we finished fourth, the first time ever in the top half of any election since we were formed, then the following week in Sleaford Lincolnshire.

Our candidate ‘The Iconic Arty-Pole’ polled 16 more votes than Richmond but finished 7th from 10, upholding our tradition of not coming last.

2016_9136_North_Kesteven_Sports_Centre_8_DecResult
Dr Caroline Johnson – Con – 17,570
Victoria Ailing – UKIP – 4,426
Ross Pepper – Lib Dem – 3,606
Jim Clarke – Labour – 3,363
Marianne Overton – Lincs Ind – 2,892
Sarah Stock – Ind – 462
The Iconic Arty Pole – Raving Loony – 200
Paul Coyne – ND – 184
Mark Suffield – ND – 74
David Bishop – Bus Pass Elvis Party  –  55

2016_9135_North_Kesteven_Sports_Centre_8_DecI arrived in Sleaford on Sunday 4th Dec, and quickly toured the public meeting places. As usual I was greeted with:
“great to see you, it wouldn’t be a real by-election if you weren’t here.”
Monday was fun, my old friend Nigel Farage held a public meeting in the local Legionnaires Club, I was there and ended up on stage when he stated that there was another party leader in attendance.

2016_9138_North_Kesteven_Sports_Centre_8_DecTuesday saw me on a radio chat show and rallying the voters. If everyone that said “we will vote Loony” did, we would win. Perhaps they did vote for the Loony, the real ones! Wednesday ‘The Iconic’ arrived. He had been campaigning in other areas and leaving Sleaford to me. We toured the area in the ‘Loony Battle Bus’ with loud-hailer on full charge, always making people smile. Both of us on radio, and filmed for the local TV news.
Thursday saw us leave our ‘digs’ in Sleaford, The Cherry Tree B&B, thanks to Pauline the landlady, a very nice place.
2016_9140_North_Kesteven_Sports_Centre_8_DecIn actual fact, right next door was ‘The Marquis of Granby’ a public house that made us very welcome, allowing me to use it as party HQ. We moved on to North Hykeham where the count was taking place, and booked into ‘The Ibis’ hotel, where we met up with Nick ‘The Flying Brick’, R U Seerius and Lady Hell ‘n Back. After meeting and greeting, all off to the count, which was another great night with cameras snapping. ‘Arty-Pole’ loved it, playing up to every click he heard, not missing a trick. 2016_9153_North_Kesteven_Sports_Centre_8_DecThe new Ukip leader of 17 days Paul Nuttall, insisted on having his picture taken with Britain’s longest serving party leader of 17 years, the Howling ‘Laud’.
All in all a very good by-election, ‘The Iconic Arty-Pole’ did us proud, and likewise we are all very proud of him!
Roll on the next one!!!
Howling

Richmond Victory Party

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Loony Campaign Poster

2016_Richmond_Loony_Vote

Witney By-election roundup

2016_8102_The_Company_of_Weavers_20_OctThis by-election was caused by mysterious disappearance of No. 10’s Cheshire Cat David Cameron.  So who better to replace him than Alisdair De Voil from Oxford, ‘The Mad Hatter’, who shouted “this is my tea party”, checked his watch, and made a dash for the nomination.

Our party leader Howling Laud arrived in Witney to support him a couple of days before the election, and was caught up in a film about ‘Political Party Leaders of Great Britain.’

2016_8110_Windrush_Leisure_Centre_20_Oct‘The Mad Hatter’, Howling and Mark Stokes, a party activist from Shrivenham, toured the constituency mostly talking in French when they couldn’t remember what they were meant to be saying in English and supping from bottles that said “drink me!”. They ended up in a very nice public house called The New Inn, where they did seven impossible things just before breakfast.

2016_8112_Windrush_Leisure_Centre_20_OctCongratulations to The Mad Hatter for increasing his vote by 100% and coming 8th out of 14 candidates. We always knew it would be a tough Constituency, but it seems we are catching up fast with the Greens and Ukip who despite all their media attention, still only have one more M.P than us.

The night of the Count saw the arrival of the party faithful, ‘Nick the Flying Brick’, RU Seerius, Lady Helenbak, Chinners, and local supporters, George, Tom & Jerry.

2016_8121_Windrush_Leisure_Centre_20_OctAs usual cameras were snapping. There was a great atmosphere at the Counting Hall with very friendly banter between candidates and all supporters.

Back to our candidate, didn’t he do well, 129 votes, coming 8th out of fourteen, and a big round of applause for all his efforts was heard around the hall.

2016_8122_Windrush_Leisure_Centre_20_OctWe all agreed afterwards that it was a great success, and we’re quite looking forward to whenever and wherever the next one may be. Once again plaudits to ‘The Mad Hatter’ he did us proud, and thanks to Julian Bones the landlord of The Old Court Hotel for all his help and everybody else who voted for us.

Howling ‘Laud’ Hope
Party Leader.

 

 

 

 

 Name of
Candidate
Description
(if any)
Number of
Votes*
COURTS, Robert Alexander The Conservative Party Candidate 17313
Elected
LEFFMAN, Elizabeth Pendrill Raphael Liberal Democrat 11611
ENRIGHT, Duncan Shaw Thomas Labour Party 5765
SANDERS, Larry Green Party 1363
BIRD, Kendrick Simon George commonly known as BIRD, Dickie UKIP 1354
SALISBURY, Helen Rachel National Health Action Party 433
SKIDMORE, Daniel James Independent 151
DE VOIL, Alasdair Iain commonly known as HATTER, Mad The Official Monster Raving Loony Party 129
WARD, Charles John Nicholas commonly known as WARD, Nicholas Independent 93
BISHOP, David Laurence Bus-Pass Elvis Party 61
JUG, Lord Toby The Eccentric Party of Great Britain 59
MCKENZIE, Winston Truman English Democrats – “Putting England First!” 52
ARNO, Emilia Rose One Love Party 44
KNIGHT, Adam Digby Independent 27

*Breaking News*

In a hurried statement today ‘Nick the Flying Brick’ party Treasurer and Shadow Minister for the ‘Abolition of Gravity’ stated categorically that the ‘Official Monster Raving Loony Party’ have had no resignations and have no plans for a leadership contest.

Tooting By-Election 16th June 2016

2016_3601_Spread_Eagle_Wandsworth_16_JunOnce again, we came, we saw, and didn’t conquer, but good fun trying. The all indelible Nick the Flying Brick was my agent, as always. He travelled down from Derbyshire and teamed up with Tooting party member, The Luscious Helen Lucas, and got the nomination papers all correct and proper, ready for the big day!

2016_3605_Spread_Eagle_Wandsworth_16_JunI arrived in Tooting on Wednesday 8th and ‘The Long Room’ bar and hotel formerly ‘The Mitre’ became our party HQ, along with JJ Moons in the High Street. If I may say at this point, the whole election streetwise was very uninspiring, ‘Sheikh Mehand’ came across from Kent to do some canvassing with me on the Friday, and even he asked “where is everybody”. Only ourselves, Des Coke of the Christian Alliance and Dr Malik of the Immigrants party were ever seen out and about. Usually there is good banter between partys when we meet up, which makes these occasions good fun. 2016_3621_Spread_Eagle_Wandsworth_16_JunDidn’t see a Blue, a Red, Lib Dem, Green, Ukip rosette anywhere, or any of these party members on the streets. In fact there were only two Campaign offices in town, Dr Malik and Labour. The usual thing is to visit them, introduce ourselves and wish them the best of luck, which once again makes for the feelgood factor. Dr Maliks office welcomed us with open arms, and made us fell very welcome. Not so, the Labour office, they told myself and the Sheikh to ‘P–s Off’, or at least one of their ‘Over Officious Opinionated Officers’ did. Accused us of standing against him, I did point out that he had it wrong way round and that he was standing against us! In a democratic election, people stand together, don’t they, he didn’t seem to think so. The local newspaper loved this story, I made sure it went in there!

2016_3632_Wandsworth_Town_Hall_16_JunThe ‘Exquisite’ Yvonne Elwood came to visit a couple of days but the weather was dreadful which didn’t help towards the atmosphere. Also Lawd Lawson and O B Joyful put in an appearance. Thanks for their commitment, sorry about the lack of sunshine!

Thursday 16th June, my birthday and polling day. The count was held in Wandsworth, not in Tooting at all. We all met up in the ‘Spread Eagle’ a public house opposite the counting house, by now RU Seerius and Lady Helenback, OB and the Lawd, Chinners and Flying, myself and Yvonne were all suitably dressed for the occasion. 2016_3640_Wandsworth_Town_Hall_16_JunLady Linda Landers also turned up but had to return home because of a burst pipe, very upset she was too! We made our usual entrance amongst clapping and cheering, cameras were snapping, a lot of hand shaking. Unfortunately to add to the doom and gloom of the weather and the evening itself, was the tragedy of Jo Cox.

2016_3648_Wandsworth_Town_Hall_16_JunNevertheless we managed to come 7th out of 14 candidates, only got 54 votes mind you. I was surprised to see the English Democrats back again, they vowed and declared never to stand again after we beat them in Eastleigh, and we beat them again this time too, just for good measure. All in all, another successful invasion into the Political World, more stories and anecdotes to remember, And thankyou to the odd 54 people who knew who to vote for!
AS A PARTING NOTE, we shall not be contesting the Batley and Spen By-election. The seat left vacant by the regrettable circumstances surrounding Jo Cox. RIP.
Howling ‘Laud Hope
Party Leader.

Labour see red in Tooting

2016_Howling_in_TootingWe like to visit other candidates office’s to introduce ourselves and wish them an enjoyable campaign. Howling Laud and Sheikh Mihand popped into the Labour headquarters in Tooting but were rudely evicted. This was in direct contrast to the friendly reception offered to us by Dr Malik’s staff (of the Immigrants Political party).
The story was covered by The Wandsworth Guardian

Welsh Assembly Landslide

Report from South West Central
Our leader arrived in Cardiff on Sunday May1st, making our party known was not too hard, everybody was looking forward to us being there. On Tues 3rd he met up with our local loony supporter Paul Campbell, Paul had arranged for a Loony Victory Party to be held in Mischiefs Wine and Entertainment bar in Cardiff for the Wed evening.
On Wed he met with the Gower Loonies from West Wales, Baron Von Claptrap and Pete D’Lune, by now Lawd Lawson and O B Joyful had arrived from Hampshire, so a great afternoon was had by all.
A fine evening it was too, Paul being the main entertainer doing his Elvis impersonation which he is well known for in South Wales, and also his Captain Madness act with his Ska – Reggae – Two Tone variations. Surprise guest was Mr Badaxe himself who had travelled down from Nottingham just to go home again afterwards. And surprise, surprise he wasn’t banned like he is most places, his bawdy songs fell on appreciative ears. By now Baron Von Thunderclap and Stormin’ Norman had arrived from Sussex, Hugo Shovit and Von Magpie Bum from Newport, South East Wales and Arty Pole from Lincolnshire. Along with the locals we had a great time, thanks to Shaun and his manager David. On the day of the count, The Good Knight Sir Nos Da arrived from Birmingham and Toy Davies from Blackpool. We had a pretty good turn out being as we were standing in all five regional seats!
Well we didn’t win, but we got 1096 votes, came 9th from 13, beat the TUSC, Independent, Communist, and Freedom of choice party’s. The count was forecast to be declared by 4.30 – 5am, and yet it was not over till 11.00am, what a long night.
Well done to all in the South Wales Central ward for voting for us, and hard luck to those that didn’t, your fault when it all goes wrong, you’ll see!!!
The Howling ‘Laud’.

General synopsis of the Welsh Assembly Thursday 5th May 2016.

South Wales Central 1096 votes (0.5%), 9th from 13 beating the TUSC, Independent, Communist and Freedom of Choice party’s.

South Wales East 1115 votes (0.6%), 8th from 11 beating the TUSC, Welsh Communist and National Front.

South Wales West 1106 votes (0.7%), 8th from 10 beating the TUSC and Welsh Communist.

Wales Mid and West 1071 votes (0.5%), 10th from 12 beating the Local Independent and Welsh Communist.

Wales North 1355 votes (0.7%), 9th from 11 beating the Independent and Welsh Communist.

Jolly well done to all that took part, 5743 votes in all, wonderful result for us not coming last anywhere.

Howling ‘Laud’ Hope
Party Leader.

Our Local Area Candidates

Known party members to date who have submitted election papers for their own local areas on Thurs 5th May 1016:
Alan Hope aka Howling ‘Laud’ Hope – Hart District Hampshire.
Alasdaire de Voile aka The Mad Hatter – Carfax Ward Oxford.
Mark Beech aka The Good Knight Sir Nos Dar – Pellsall Ward, Wallsall.
Andrew Cameron aka Lord Cameron of Roundwood – Baguley Ward, Manchester.
Shaun Jones aka Sir Oink-a-Lot – Sharston Ward, Manchester.
John Horner aka Johnny Disco – Northenden Ward, Manchester.
This is apart from the 25 of us standing in ‘The Welsh Assembly’ on the same day!
We also have six sitting Councillors at this time. Lets wish them all the best of luck!
Howling ‘Laud’ Hope – Party Leader.