The ‘Official Monster Raving Loony Party’, would like to add their sincere condolences for the loss of our Dear Queen Elizabeth. – God bless Great Britain.
Howling ‘Laud’ Hope Loony Party Leader
We feel very proud and privileged to have been given permission to hold our 38th annual conference in ‘The House of Commons’
The first time ever that such a venue has been made available. ‘The House of Commons’ being the famous music venue in Coalville, The Victoria Inn. Which by sheer coincidence is owed by a certain – John Commons.
The event takes place Thur 22 Fri 23 Sat 24th September.
Candidates and members arriving Thurs for a weekend of fun and merriment, Fri and Sat all day, lots of shenanigans and music, with our world famous Cabinet Reshuffle taking place Sat afternoon. Event open to all, come and see, or even join, a party that knows how to party. If not already familiarised, wear a silly hat at least, or dress as you see fit.
A film company from Warner Bros will be in attendance, along with local TV crews and other media outlets. So come on down, or come on up, from wherever you are, in this wonderful land of ours!
Howling ‘Laud’ Hope – Loony Party Leader.
Tel 07946292557 mob
(I shall be in situ at The Vic as from Thurs 15th for 10 days, if any of you want to make a week of it, some usually do)
In order to help with the Energy crisis we propose
1. We will get rid of the Energy Price Cap and replace it with a Top Hat (This will also help our Millenery Industry)
2. We will get rid of all Standing Charges. (We are quite capable of sitting down and freezing to death)
3. All the hot air spoken in Parliament will be redirected to the Gas Distribution Networks.
It wasn’t until the notice of poll was issued that I realised my proposer was an Earle! He and his partner Sas run the 8 Bells where staff and pub dog are all wearing ‘Baron for Bolney’ badges.
Kristy the Conservative candidate canvassed the 8 Bells, but was told that all of Bolney would be voting for Baron! Perhaps that’s why she said that she thought I was going to win the election when she introduced herself at our Parish Council meeting. She asked for some ‘Baron for Bolney’ badges for herself and her family which I gladly gave her so long as she promised to wear one.
If all of those who pledged to vote for me did I would win. In reality the winner will be the Apathy Party – supported by those who don’t vote and then complain about those elected.
Little chance of winning but confident I won’t come last.
Baron Von Thunderclap
All is set and ready to go at ‘The Victoria Inn’ Coalville, Leicestershire on Thurs 22 to Sat 24 Sept.
Bands on Friday include ‘Morderstein’ a Rammstein tribute band (Shock Rock) – ‘Audiorage’ Rage Against the Machine’, tribute, – plus Gripper and the Gonads.
Saturday, – Cocked & Loaded, Glam Rock (Hair Metal) plus Murder of the Crows, Punk Rock covers.
And of course appearing at anytime at all without notice ‘Badaxe’ plus ‘The Big Fibbers’.
Accommodation is available at the Vic, mainly cheap single, sharing, call John Commons 01530 814718. There is also camping with caravan and motor home parking. There is top class accommodation, 250yds away at ‘The Hermitage Park Hotel call 01530 814814. – Some rooms are booked out to us already.
Half mile and a short taxi ride away is ‘The Halfway Hotel’ 01530 452697. Other B&B and guest houses are not far away.
I stayed at the Vic and the Hermitage, on my way back from Wakefield last week, all is fine. See you all there if not before.
The Howling ‘Laud’.
Well done to ‘Sir Archibald Stanton Earl Eaton’, for not coming last yet again. We beat UKIP and four other parties coming 10th out of 15.
I arrived on 19th June and ensconced myself into ‘The Victoria Inn’ in Horbury, part of the constituency. I was covering for Archie on the run up, as he had already booked to go to Crete before the election. Thanks to Christian the landlord, and his customers we had a few laughs and captured a few votes.
Archie arrived home on the Tuesday so we had a couple of days together canvassing. An entourage of 12 attended the count including The Flying Brick, RU Seerius, Lady Helen‘n’Back, Baron Badger. Everybody was pleased to see us, ‘it wouldn’t be a real election if you weren’t here’, we hear that all the time.
I did smile when I heard someone refer to Wakefield as Wokefield! Soon our day will come, maybe next time, who knows, we shall be there!
Howling ‘Laud’ Hope Party Leader
All the Loony Party members congregated at our by-election HQ the Victoria Pub in Horbury early evening in anticipation of the count later that night. Some members enjoying a curry beforehand. There were eleven of us in total including Gilly, Sir Archibald’s right hand man.
The Count was at Thornes Park Athletic Stadium and on arrival shortly after 12.30am we were greeted to our customary reception with heads turning, cameras flashing and loud cheers.
People were keen to have photographs taken with us and remarked on our colourful attire.
Interviews were conducted and worldwide coverage from the TV stations ensured that we had much appreciated publicity.
There was a low turnout and as predicted the successful party’s name began with the letter L (Loony that is).
We finished tenth out of fifteen successfully beating the UKIP candidate.
The announcement was made shortly before 4am and afterwards we all went our separate ways proud in the certain knowledge that our Party had carried out its democratic duty.
A great night was had by all and we send our thanks to all our supporters and sponsors out there.
Watch out there’s a Loony about . . .
Sir Archibald Stanton of Earl ‘Eaton